Bringing Down my Chinese Walls

It hasn't been a long time since I started this blog. The purpose is for me to write my memoirs - events as they happened in my growing years and until some three years back. But I realized that any of my life stories cannot be appreciated unless I include how I brought down the walls around my heart and set the me inside free.

It happened when I was about 20years old. I had gone to my christian club site just to pass the time. I hadn't much to do that day and I didn't want to spend the time in my room. On getting there, I noticed there were new posts on the news board at the reception. Casually, I scanned each one until eyes settled on the one that changed my life. I don't recollect the writer's name but the words said people that shut themselves up from within and refrain from loving others will surely avoid hurt and pain but conversely, they cannot receive love and care and enjoy life. That touched me.

My background had ensured that I didn't open up myself. I had deliberately refrained from relationships beyond the superficial but I also couldn't enjoy the benefits of loving and being loved.

There and then, I made up my mind to bring down my guard and allow myself to live - free. Consequences? I was heartbroken the very next year - less than six months after my decision. But I have no regrets. Life is better this way.